Confessions of an American Lolita

The other day I came across a Lolita web comic by an artist named Lilly Higgs. As I read through the first arc, I was amazed at how easily I could relate to something like that - a lone Lolita in a small town, relying on the internet for other Lolita friends and sharing her coordinates online with the rest of the Lolita community.

This comic tells the story of Emily, an 18 year old Sweet Lolita who finds herself questioning her fashion choices after being viciously torn apart in an online forum, similar to getoffegl or loli_secrets. It was a sad story, but the saddest part is that it's all based off true events. 

It was this comic that actually prompted me to visit some of these Livejournal communities and what I found there appalled me. Here we are, girls (and boys) of an alternative fashion subculture, tearing each other apart over some ruffles and lace. It's really rather...pathetic. I saw "secrets" about people who didn't even come close to deserving such slander, silly commentaries about how this person looks awful in bonnets or the color pink...and other such nonsense. Most of it was downright cruel.

What really baffles me is that you don't see this in other fashion subcultures. I've been part of the Goth scene for a while now and with so many different sub-styles of Goth you'd think the factions would be eating each other by now, but that's simply not the case. There's a sense of community there and encouragement. I may prefer Victorian mourning clothes over cyberlox and pvc, but I can still appreciate that each person has their own interpretation of a style...who am I to say what looks "good" and what doesn't? 

So why all this viciousness in Lolita? Why all the catty drama and bickering? It's not very lady-like and it doesn't make one a better Lolita - it just makes them a bitch. I wouldn't be very surprised now if someone decides to post something nasty about me after reading this, but it does disappoint me.  Shouldn't we be sticking together and giving each other support? The rest of the world thinks we look like a bunch of fairy-tale loonies. We shouldn't be thinking the same thing of each other just because we don't all wear the exact same coordinate or dress in the exact same way. 

*sigh* I'm tired of ranting, so I'll stop now. If you want to read Confessions of an American Lolita (which is adorable by the way) visit it here: Click Me! ^_^


  1. The reason there are so many catty girls in Lolita is because it's a fashion/community devoted to buying 300 dollar dresses, many of which look like that a spoiled little girl would own. Beyond that, the fashion also has very many strict rules. The highest quality clothes have the smallest waist line, meaning most people need to care a great deal about their appearance to be able to fit into them. Many communities enable anonymous posting. Evenif they don't, you're still just a username to most people. Technically, you can say whatever you want and fear no reprocussions. When you combine that with the fact that most of these girls are teen-aged or in their early twenties, it just makes for one huge bitchfest.

  2. I agree with you. That is the reason I stay away from egl and such. I dress Lolita for myself, to make me feel better, I'm not gonna put that out there for other girls to slam me down. I think that the community should just except people for who they are. If they like to wear tights with their frills or don't have enough petti coats, or hell can't afford brand, who cares. Don't we all just love what Lolita makes us feel? Like we are still young and cute and that magic still exist?

  3. I have never understand sites like lolita secrets. I've always wonder if posting a secret really make the creator of the post feel better? I think not. Sites like that only create a bunch of negative emotions. I can't believe someone would actually visit a site like that and feel happy when they leave. I think it's disguising. People who enjoys bullying should go see a shrink and sort out their messed up head. I can't for anything in the world understand why people would ever visit sites like that. If people spent half the time they do on criticizing on making and creating positive things instead they would feel a lot better and the world would be a much better place for the rest of us too.